I had the dive-bar blues when Diana disappeared I had the dive-bar blues, I was filling up with fear Katie became Libby while I had to wait to go crossing Russell Road back into my home state south of Kenosha County on Wisconsin border lies a road with bridge over you stand on between two sides Katie became Libby years after the courtroom Katie sat next to Mom Dad was missing from the pews a softball game in summer Libby in bleachers I told her if she'd come I'd tell my real name to her I had the dive-bar blues when Diana disappeared I had the dive-bar blues, I was filling up with fear of crossing Russell Road of crossing Russell Road of crossing Russell Road don't misunderstand me I just needed to be back in the water and again baptized I should have been a brother but tried to be a lover when the faith I was born in got left behind Libby in the light points to sundial Katie in picture burning in the pile it's unfair to consider and wrong to reminisce how a past did once vanish with just one perfect kiss I had the dive-bar blues when Diana disappeared I had the dive-bar blues, I was filling up with fear of crossing Russell Road of crossing Russell Road of crossing Russell Road crossing Russell Road crossing Russell Road crossing Russell Road crossing Russell Road

every guy in the place tonight and at least four girls pick her out from sights in room as center of caramel swirl her smile begins the greeting and the tone precise starts releasing cues to think in defense automatically “everyone loves Libby but me” in the effort to be unique and not just a body that breathes they’ll claim they’re not entranced by the grace into which she taps and those working by her side each night will have even more to deny and think to themselves dismissively “everyone loves Libby but me” cause they wouldn’t fall for same reason that pulls in everyone else who wouldn’t see what makes her so special they’d be the only ones that could tell when her shift comes to a close she’ll probably just go home watch some TV and go to bed frightened of connection around Seattle hearts quickly beat after a single glimpse from the seat vowing before admitting defeat “everyone loves Libby but me”

he saw I made her cry and led her to the swings I took hand of girl at my side and tied around her finger a blue ring made out of the strands of a shattered water balloon she laughed and threw it down I looked away and suddenly saw you and in the courtroom Katie watched my old name out being crossed replaced by mom’s maiden and my middle one Dad said son do this we’ll be through my heart’s a water balloon leaking out tears I baptized you in that washed away your original sin if you throw away the name I gave to you you’ll break my heart like a water balloon once I knew a girl who'd just turned eighteen years old I was twenty-two couldn’t be with her so I’d been told she took me home from party after the funeral asked me if Chris Moon was in Texas still we drove through Kenosha, I told Katie about my name how everything was different she wouldn't be the same didn't see her again til I stopped back at the Chancery she was last one left from summer stood there shocked to see me and her careful body was swallowed by lobby I had to cross light from window made it seem as if no time had been lost I could feel the rest there with us, as I saw her down they'd flown all the angels that were once gathered round the throne I met Diana through Joanna who with I worked weddings cleaning up at end of night Joanna and Adam would start to sing Di was back from New York, I asked her out after shift we were in front of bar smoking watching the smoke lift a year later I messed what I had by messing round with Di went back to New York thinking I'd already done it when she came back to Seattle, she ran to Adam after I told I was searching for the angels that were once gathered round the throne I told Katie in the letter the world will treat you rough Diana said remember I'm the one that you really love I want no moment to be wasted and each one to be atoned by the presence of the angels that are gathered round the throne Libby sat on steps by lockers back from Italy barely worked with her 'for she left, I was turning thirty even though I know now I had to be alone I still wanted angels that were gathered round the throne

have you ever been hurt and wish someone close would come see, pull you back in through loss death drugging and mugging after rug's been pulled from under the feet of a sworn protector the snow makes me a cold goddess tap-dancing for her breakfast “he started there ‘fore you and I in high school with his best friends he worked so hard, was full of hope, I thought of him as just a kid on his 21st birthday, he said he’d marry me and Joanna too you broke my heart like a water balloon he saw that I was sad when you confessed everything he said ‘Diana you’ll cheer up if you meet me on the swings’ I said’ I'm going back to Brooklyn,’ he said ‘I'm coming with you’ you broke my heart like a water balloon you should plan a trip that's what you need to break away from need to complain and being up all night your radar crammed with lights don't come to New York City don't come to New York City there's fish swimming in your pond I bet don\'t come to New York City don't come to New York City don't come to New York City yet you said I should call you you didn’t know what to do you were still acting young but old enough to know the risks of not choosing to resist don't come to New York City don't come to New York City I’ve been walking on a wire without a net don\'t come to New York City don't come to New York City don't come to New York City yet”

well I was dying fast like a snowflake in June trying to patch up the leak and fix the water balloon Lloyd and Tom were a waiter and a busser who opened the place but went down to gutter, given second chance in their own balloon's burst they drowned Tom loved the Oxy Cotton and the chef he loved the meth Lloyd really loved heroin and I had my own addiction I was craving from a heart broken like a water balloon that I'd fill up with grenadine to remember sweet and cover all that was to come and the water balloon erased a blue moon at the backyard baptism on a Sunday afternoon well I was dying fast like a snowflake in June trying to patch up the leak and fix the water balloon well I was dying fast, liquid slipped through hands, I got hired on April Fool's Lloyd Tom Myrriah and me on the first day as the chef went over the rules Myrriah was special from New Mexico not Santa Fe but near she seemed full of hot desert air but up close you’d hope maybe it was lack of fear she got Libby hired in early summer and let Lloyd crash at her place she knew Libby from the U and liked to eat food from trash rather than let it go to waste when Libby came back from Italy, Myrriah’d been fired and Lloyd left for winter he came back begging staff for the cash to patch with during rush in dinner and the water balloon erased a blue moon at the backyard baptism on a Sunday afternoon well I was dying fast like a snowflake in June trying to patch up the leak and fix the water balloon well everybody's heard this before who’s tried to resurrect a love shattered into pieces that you won’t admit is dead a tear and a half after we had opened, Tommy and the chef went into rehab Aaron and Shauna saw Lloyd walking downtown skinny and ragged his family from New Jersey called us up for just a little help in finding him I think back telling myself I was in no shape to try and be a friend I felt the light streaming from Libby that once through me had flowed reflecting off a sugar nile I’d fill balloon again with and hold at Libby's birthday party there you stood, Elizabeth by another name for that moment I was free of trying to force another heart to feel the same and the water balloon erased a blue moon at the backyard baptism on a Sunday afternoon well I was dying fast like a snowflake in June til you reached out and offered me the water balloon but I couldn't see you right away cause I was still waiting for the day for my dad to call me back down in the pool made out of tears saved up in the water balloon he’d say don’t worry son it’s OK I don’t understand but I still love you anyway if this world ever puts you in the path to ruin think of the tears in me, the tears in the water balloon in the water balloon, in the water balloon all I’m asking is have some faith in me open up and embrace the mystery

I

let's go down the sugar nile sail it for a little while close our eyes and travel a whole mile forget about worries and cares where they're not, we will be there we'll go riding down the sugar nile baby let's sail away on a red river that flows with a beat-up Elmo doll you got when just two-years old he'll lead us on a cow to a boat in the harbor and we'll sail towards we what can't yet remember: the taste of Grandma's candy an unscattered and close family I was swallowed by the harbor when I was just a child Uncle Joe would walk us there and I'd see my mother smile then cinnamon would fall and I'd keep trying to get back to that moment as life's mission I'm trying to tell to you baby I want you to believe understand I was born with need to ride ride ride on the sugar nile to ride ride ride on the sugar nile to ride ride ride on the sugar nile to ride oh to ride I know you're worried I keep craving and I'll never be done as I worry I take too much and baby you're too young to want to shatter prisms sweet and fight to find in mystery a clear path as a way back that so easily could lead to ride ride ride on the sugar nile to ride ride ride on the sugar nile to ride ride ride on the sugar nile to ride oh to ride

I was swallowed by the harbor but escaped to Interstate worked with my sister Liz and Chris at the Chancery off highway another waitress named Elizabeth with red hair through mind would run but when I moved away that winter, Katie I couldn’t stop thinking of 5 years later in Seattle, a DJ played “It's Time to Say Goodbye” as we were cleaning up the wedding, me and Adam tore the dance floor tiles Joanna stood up straight, like an opera singer sang along as her youngest sister walked in, me and Adam’s hearts were gone you broke my heart, you broke my heart you broke my heart like a water balloon you broke my heart, you broke my heart you broke my heart like a water balloon brown hair under bright sun sipping a salted caramel shake Libby looked just liked Diana but Katie’s memory she did wake just when I told her one sweet sip could always be enough I collapsed from crash of sugar then no longer in the blood you broke my heart, you broke my heart you broke my heart like a water balloon you broke my heart, you broke my heart you broke my heart like a water balloon I’d fill from the sugar nile to forget and try and wash away ‘til at party with blonde hair sat Elizabeth with another name I was scared of dipping toe in water for fear that I’d drown then my father’s hand pushed me in and again it pulled me out love can be a rushing flood, whole soul gets rearranged but in wreckage and rubble, you’ll see only beautiful change our love was a water balloon we let back and forth be tossed ‘til it slipped and hit the ground and then all we had was lost you broke my heart, you broke my heart you broke my heart like a water balloon you broke my heart, you broke my heart you broke my heart like a water balloon you broke my heart like a water balloon let’s go down the sugar nile, sail it for a little while close our eyes and travel a whole mile dip toes in and be baptized come out full hearts and clear eyes we’ll go riding down the sugar nile let’s go down the sugar nile, sail it for a little while close our eyes and travel a whole mile on the rock candy river we will go to Mt. Prospect it will flow we’ll go riding down the sugar nile let’s go down the sugar nile, sail it for a little while close our eyes and travel a whole mile plant a salted caramel kiss on me God didn’t want me to be lonely we’ll go riding down the sugar nile let’s go down the sugar nile, sail it for a little while close our eyes and travel a whole mile let breeze blow away the truth Mama don’t take away my pink booth we’ll go riding down the sugar nile let’s go down the sugar nile, sail it for a little while close our eyes and travel a whole mile see clearly with both eyes under blue moon we’ll be baptized we’ll go riding down the sugar nile